By on June 11, 2012

My son is going to be 12 this year.  How is that possible?  Almost thirteen years ago we were overwhelmed with selecting an egg donor, hanging on to every word our Reproductive Endocrinologist said,  and embarking upon the journey of a lifetime.  Scared to death as we were putting my reproductive life into the hands of another,  and unsure about many things, but focusing on the goal which was becoming parents, the only part we were sure about which was simply being

“Mom and Dad”

It seems like yesterday that we were gently placing our son’s tiny seven pound body into the car seat and  strapping him in for his first ride home. Oh how terrified we were.  I think we drove 25 miles per hour all the way home. And then we joyously experienced all of those firsts, his first smile, his first words, his first steps, lost his first tooth, and before I knew it my husband and I were taking him to his first day of Kindergarten.

And now he’s embarking upon puberty, middle school, and he’s just plain growing up with all the stuff that goes with that — namely independence.

Over the past 12 years I have had plenty of time to think about my role in my son’s life, the loss of my genetics, being a mom, and what that all means.  During this time my son and I have had many conversations about “all of this” and my son who is wise beyond his years has simplified it for me. 

He says to me, “Mom, I am your child.” And while he waxes Yoda I am reminded me of Barry Manilow’s simple yet powerful song: I am your child

Wherever you go you take me too
Whatever I know, I learned from you
Whatever I do, you taught me to do

I am your child
And I am your chance

Whatever will come, will come from me
Tomorrow is won by winning me

Whatever I am, you taught me to be
I am your hope, I am your chance

I am your child

Whatever I am, you taught me to be
I am your hope, I am your chance

I am your child

These children we work so hard to bring into the world are simply our children.  It doesn’t matter that they don’t share our DNA what matters is they are our children.  And as the song goes “Whatever I am, you taught me to be, I am your hope, I am your chance, I am your child.”

Damn if this doesn’t bring it home for me. 

1 Comment
  1. Reply

    E and R

    June 11, 2012

    Great song and so very true. I could not be my daughters mother any more than I am (save for genetics). Our children are truly a blessing…no matter how they come to us.



Portland, OR

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June 2012
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